A Year of Reflection

     "Year's end in neither an end nor beginning but a going on, with all the wisdom that experience can instill in us."

       Hal Borland

A year of pain and disappointment also meant a year for learning, change, and growth. A year that started with confusion and a downward spiral, finished with ever-growing optimism and an understanding of what peace could look like. This year, while definitely not what I hoped for, ended up being exactly what I needed. This year provided the opportunity for me to gain a deeper understanding and appreciation of my whole self. It brought me people and connections that ultimately helped me realize that I am never truly alone. This year gave me a chance to see how strong I truly am. And even in the hardest moments and on the darkest days, this year constantly reminded me of the goodness, love, and peace of Jesus.

In February, while leaving from a weekend in Lynchburg, Virginia, I was given a card by the Liberty University Softball Team. On this card was a bible verse on one side and a note on the other. The note, at the time, seemed so surreal that a complete stranger knew the exact words of what I needed to hear at the time.

The note said,

"Kasey, God knows your heart. Put your worries into him and he will give you peace."

I got this note two days before I had my ACL reconstruction surgery. It was a note that I held onto in the back of my phone, just so I could hold onto the words that gave me the strength to show up each day even when it was hard. These words gave me the courage to overcome challenges, pain, heartache, and hopelessness. These words gave me peace.

Let me just say, God never ceases to amaze me. In October, the word peace was brought back to my attention in attempt to help me find comfort in the midst of many struggles. It was a word that I found repeatedly showing up in unexpected places. Instead of fighting it, I started to lean into it, looking for it, keeping it at the forefront of my mind. This simple word became my daily reminder to surrender my struggles. That God will walk through the suck with me and when it gets too hard, He is there to carry me through it.

I didn't come into this year expecting the things that happened to happen. Never in a million years would I have thought that by the end of 2023, I would have had two knee surgeries. But with these unexpected struggles, came unexpected joy, relationships, memories, and growth. In hindsight, the things that happened were exactly what I needed to happen. I am a firm believer that everything in life happens for a reason. We may never know what that reason is, but if you take the time to look close enough, you will always learn the lesson sooner or later.

Here are some of the lessons that I learned this year:

• Storms are temporary. They may seem like they will last forever, but eventually they end. You just have to be willing to stay steady and embrace what comes.
• Endurance isn't simply getting to the other side of the struggle. Endurance is leaning in and growing in the struggle through faith.
• Life is not defined by circumstances and events. It is defined by how we choose to use these circumstances to grow.
• Our job is not to determine the outcome, rather to have faith no matter the outcome.
• What we think is the end, is often just a new beginning.
• Rejecting reality, doesn't change it.
• Nothing in this world is too great for God.
• I can do hard things.

I am grateful for where this year brought me. I am grateful for the lessons learned, people met, places traveled, and memories made. I am grateful that I am surrounded by people who genuinely love and support me through everything I do. There is no escaping the fact that life is messy and full of trouble. BUT, despite that, I am looking forward to seeing what this next year brings, the good, the bad, and everything in between.

As we head into the new year, I will leave you with this verse that brought me encouragement through the adversity of 2023.

"Blessed in the man who remains steadfast under trial, for when he has stood the test he will receive the crown of life, which God has promised to those who love him."

James 1:12 ESV